Backward Rain

  February 7, 2004

 

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Saturday, February 07, 2004

On Thursday I notified my supervisors that I will be retiring. It was the final commitment to a decision I’ve been contemplating for several months and it feels good to finally get it out of the way. It was another one of those "defining moments" that I’ve been having recently and now I can move forward with future plans.

 

Future plans. I’ve never been big on making elaborate plans for the future and I guess I’m not what you would call a “self actualized personality”.  During my senior year in college one of my professors asked the students to briefly write down their plans for after graduation.  He read some of them aloud and they were filled with ambitious ruminations about looking for jobs with good retirement benefits and health care plans.  The entire class burst out laughing when he read my note which simply said I hadn’t made any plans.  Like the lone drunk at a party, I hadn’t realized that I was the only clueless person in the room.

 

On the other hand, in my current situation I’ve found myself with an exceptional chance to retire relatively young.  I’m not taking this good luck for granted and I don’t want to waste a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity.  For now I’m not making “lofty” plans.  I’m mostly interested in not blowing my good fortune. For 25 years I’ve been getting up at 4 A.M. and commuting 2 hours a day. Now I’m just looking forward to being a night person again.

 

 My last official day at work is March 14 though with 32 days vacation on the books, I may sneak out a little early. 

 

THEN

August 11, 1967 Friday

Things have gotten back to normal as far as work goes. It seemed pretty bad with Ron until the day after my day off.  When I came back he acted his normal self.

I know when school starts I'm going to miss working.  It is hard but we have a good time goofing around in the back.

I got my schedule changed around today and instead of taking World History, I'll be taking Business Education.  I have to have an easy course this year to bring up my grade average.  As it is, I'm probably looking at Junior college.

The summer is almost over and I must say it certainly is going fast.  Only slight changes have taken place that give me any hints that the summer is running out.  It used to be fairly light when I got up at 5:30 but now it getting darker and darker as time goes on.  Now I even get up before the birds.

I've been trying hard to take notice of the world and nature but it isn't as easy as I expected.  During school when I'm forced to sit in my room to study, I look out and see beautiful sunsets and scenery.  I know I can't take time to go out and enjoy it and it drives me mad.  Now I have the free time but instead of going outside to enjoy the world around me, I find I don't even notice it.  I might spend the whole evening lying on my bed listening to the radio.  I guess its true when they say you only appreciate the things you haven't got.

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