Planting trees, trapping gophers, clearing brush, repairing chainsaws and fixing the well. That's retired life in the backcountry and this is my Journal.
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Rob

A log, for me. Top of the Head Stuff.

Tuesday August 25, 2009

I have the sense that summer is coming to a close. Subtle changes just beginning.  Longer shadows, shorter days and reddening of the poison oak are all signs. Wish I could say cooler but that won't be in the cards for some time.

Current projects are cleaning the barn, taking care of an orphan crow and figuring out how to deal with a stray cat that showed up this spring. The cat is friendly but needy and I'm feeding him often. Trying to fatten him up for the winter because he can't come into the house. He's too wild for that.  But he'd be a fine indoor/outdoor cat for someone with a cat door. He's not neutered and that should be done.

Concerned about a family gathering this fall in Maryland. More social than the simple Cedar Creek Reenactment that Barry & I had originally planed on attending.

Summer accomplishments: Built grow cabinet. Moved toy hauler. Grew 1 large indica. Many books. Mouse control project.

The novelty of smoking is finally wearing off. That only took a year.

Monday April 6, 2009

A beautiful day. Perfect actually and I managed to get out and enjoy some of it.  Did the pond walk, deck meditation and then moved the toy hauler over to the deck. Have it lined up so the back folds down onto the deck. Makes a nice club house with toilet, water, stove and refrigerator all available.

Now at least the trailer will get some use instead of sitting by the barn collecting dust.

Smoked a hit around noon and I'm toking up now at 6 PM.

Saturday April 4, 2009

Started the day with enthusiasm for cleaning the house. Spent the morning puttering around straightening up the mess. Feeling antsy so took some cold medication that calmed me a bit.  Mostly browsing the net and drinking coffee when not doing the cleaning.

First smoke at around 3:30. Kept it to one hit which seems reasonable for this variety. More and you find yourself unable to maintain, slightly panicky and into negative analyses of past events.

Picked up the mail at 4:30 and received an eBay incense ash catcher.

Paying a lot of attention to my 8 - 2" seedlings.  California Big Bud from dispensary bag seed.

Volunteered with a local dispensary to donate a grow for a needy patient. Doubt anything will come from that.  I'm way out of the "Growers" clique that usually would do something like this. Interesting if they even bother to respond to my email.

April 3, 2009 - Friday

Went to L.A. yesterday and renewed my Medical Marijuana Referral. No problem and I'm probably one of their easier patients. I have all the medical documents and prescriptions I need to support my use of marijuana for migraine headaches.

So I'm legal for a year and I'm allowed to grow 6 plants to maturity. While I was in LA I picked up 3/8ths of some mid grade sativa. They're calling it "SnowCap" or "Green C" not that the names really mean anything. It comes on very strong but that isn't sustained for much more than an hour. From there it seems to be a medium stone for a couple of hours. Kind of sneaks up on you. Slight panicky feeling when it first comes on and it's not that trippy. Not sure if that's just because I've jumped to fresh stuff. Suppose I need to give it a week or two before reviewing. :)

March 30, 2009 - Monday

Catherine is in L.A. taking care of her brother who has just had knee surgery.  I spent the day straight until 5:30 or so and finally lit up at about 5:30.  Marched through the morning, bored but determined.  Even did the 30 minute walk around the pond; an effort that even surprised me. Really was in no mood. A bad mood or more appropriately, a dark mood. Worried that the only time I have joy these days is when I'm stoned.  Not sure that I'm ever really happy when I'm straight.  Too often bummed from the noise of the ego and memories from the past peppering my consciousness at light speed before I can identify them as harbingers of regret that cause me to suffer. They come in under the radar and give me that tinge of pain that doesn't disappear even though I've rationalized them away as unimportant relics spewed out by the egotistic mechanism that is the mind.

8:07 PM - Currently at my desk, baked, and wondering if I can keep a journal when the only time I feel inspired to write is after a few tokes on a pipe.  It leads to writings with run-on sentences and babbling ramblings that drift off into nothingness and are incomprehensible when read straight. But...

The hardest thing about writing while stoned is remembering why you started the sentence ...

Buddhism is a major interest of mine these days.  Not sure what else to call it, perhaps mindfulness would be better. After all, mindfulness is the bottom line in Buddhism; what's left after you strip away all the peripheral crap that was added over the centuries.  Mindfulness is the Buddhism Buddha taught, and Einstein.

I've missed writing. It just became a chore. My writing was the ego me, phony, written with the reader in mind.

March 17, 2009 - Tuesday

Up at 4:30 to drink coffee, pet Blackie and walk Catherine to the car.

Smoked a joint at 7:30 to brighten up the day and succeeded in doing that. 

9:45 went for my walk around the pond, 32 minutes. Had to talk myself into it but was glad I did. Now headed out to 20 minutes of meditation on the deck. It's already 10:20!  Shorts weather and it feels good.

Cut it short, spooked by John getting in his car & driving out.